Gaining Perspective Through Distance

     First, I need to apologize for my apparent absence from this blog. I did not die, my computer did not break, and I did not forget I had a blog. Therefore, I have no excuse for the extended absence, I was lazy, and I've had a lot of work to do for my classes. But I'm back now, and it's just water under the bridge.

      Perspective. Aren't we always looking for perspective? Well, I think I've found some. I spent thousands of dollars, passed nearly 24 hours in airports, and gave up the opportunity to work all summer, but I think I've found some perspective. I've found it in three parts of my life: my personal life (read: friends and family), my professional life (read: nursing classes), and my American life (read: Diet Coke and flush-able toilet paper).

      To begin, I've been focusing on the people with whom I surround myself on a daily basis. Of course, there's family. They are the ones who are always there. They're there when you want them to be, they're there when you don't. They're there when you need them, and they're there when you don't think you need them, but you really do. With this, I have been incredibly blessed.
     The idea of friends is very different. Over the past 8ish years of my life, the process of developing friendships has been very significant. First you need to find perspective candidates: people with similar interests, people with clever tongues, people who just catch your eye for no reason whatsoever. Then, over time friendships develop. Here in Spain, it doesn't really work like that. I was thrust into a tiny group of people, and we were randomly sorted into different neighborhoods throughout the city. I've become friends with my roommate, classmates, and people who live nearby. Because of this, I'm with people I would normally have probably never noticed. I'm not sure if this is good or bad, but it is definitely different. The relationship I have with them is very different than the relationship I have with my friends back home. When we leave here, I will miss the people I've met; I already miss some people that left at the end of May. However, it's nothing like the feeling of missing someone who has been your best friend for a year. I realize with the new perspective that I've gained, that my friends are important, and they are to be cherished.

      Wow, what fantastic, tiny, insignificantly wonderful things we have in the United States. Admittedly, we have no culture, but I don't want culture. I want Diet Coke. I want to throw my toilet paper in the toilet. I want a nice cold glass of milk with a PB&J on cheap, soggy white bread. I want to get into my car and drive to the other end of campus, instead of walking. These are the things about which we need perspective. We need to notice what we have in our lives, that we take completely for granted, but would miss so much if they were gone.

      Thirdly, Those of us drawn to healthcare as a profession (focus: nursing) are an interesting breed. Bear with me as I generalize and stereotype throughout this paragraph. We often neglect ourselves to care for others. It's what we do; it's how we get by. Here in Spain, I have no one to take care of. There's no hospital full of patients waiting for the nervous nursing student to take their blood pressure, to bring them water, or to tell their real nurse that they need their pills. There are no Fairmont Assisted Living facilities waiting for me to punch in and change diapers, serve meals, wash bathrooms, and do laundry. The only person here for me to take care of is myself. And it's miserable. Sleeping 8 hours at night, eating 3 meals a day, taking time to read, play guitar, and watch TV. It's not my style. It doesn't fulfill me, and I'm accomplishing nothing. My new perspective has made me realize how dedicated I really am to becoming, not just a nurse, but the best nurse I can be. My wheels are spinning here, and I'm accomplishing nothing. I'm ready to put my scrubs back on and get to a 6:30am clinical in sub-zero temperatures.

      Now, I don't want to give you the wrong impression. This trip is one of the best experiences of my lifetime. I don't regret it at all. I'm also not ready to leave Spain. I am ready to be home, though. So, this week, my goal is to work toward some perspective about what I have here. I'm going to try to look at my life in Spain the same way I have been looking back at my life in the US. And now, since you've endured the entire rant that preceded this paragraph, I'd like to reward you with a couple photos!

Puente Nuevo in Ronda

Another view of Ronda

We went to Ronda on Saturday, which was a beautiful city, but since it was build on cliffs in a mountain, there were tons of stairs, and about 4 hours of walking up and down those stairs. Nice town, but my blisters tell me to never go back!